fiance chapter 12

“Just… just wondering where the lilies are,” she stammered, biting her lip. She remembered her mother’s warning never to start a sentence with “just,” saying nothing made her seem more foolish.

The Duke, however, seemed unconcerned. He glanced around. “I believe I heard they’re in the greenhouse. Shall we go and see?”

“But Felix…”

“It’s fine. You want to see them, don’t you? Felix is enjoying himself. I guarantee it.” His tone and demeanor seemed lighter than before. With Felix, he had seemed like nothing more than a bored, powerful man. Now, he seemed genuinely cheerful, almost like any other young man. How old was the Duke, anyway? Sophia was suddenly embarrassed that she couldn’t recall. She hurried after him.

“Y-Your pace is… fast.” She’d stuttered again. She bit her lip habitually, and the Duke, stopping, looked intently at her face once more.

“You keep biting your lip.”

“I’m nervous.”

“It looks like you’re shy around me.” His observation made her blush again. Not wanting to lie, she admitted the truth. “That’s partly true. I stammer like a fool.”

He laughed then, a genuinely amused laugh. “You’re not a fool.”

“Then what does Cal consider foolish?”

His steps faltered again. He looked at her, a flicker of surprise in his eyes. Emboldened, Sophia continued, “You told me to call you Cal last time. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not. I just didn’t expect you to do it so readily.”

“Why? Do I seem stupid?”

“No, afraid.”

This time, Sophia stopped. She hadn’t realized he knew. Or rather, even if he knew, she hadn’t expected him to say it. To Sophia, the Duke seemed to be putting on a performance: an act of loving and cherishing her, and of her loving him in return. Hadn’t he claimed she confessed her love? Had something changed his mind? Perhaps it was just a whim. It was well known that the powerful were often capricious. But Sophia was glad. She preferred the truth to empty affection.

“Cal.” The greenhouse was visible in the distance, a large structure filled with blooming lilies. At her call, the Duke turned back to face her, the greenery behind him. The proximity made her suddenly aware of his attire and his height. He was dressed casually in a fine silk waistcoat over his shirt, sleeves rolled up, revealing his forearms. His collar was open, exposing his striking Adam’s apple and collarbone. Sophia felt her face flush for a different reason. For the first time, she was aware of him as a man, a very handsome one at that.

She hesitated, then spoke. “Tell me what happened that night.”

“As I recall, you confessed your love to me, and you drank poison.”

“That’s too brief.”

“So you want me to reenact the entire conversation like some jester?” The imperious tone returned to his voice. Sophia trembled slightly. “I’m not asking for a reenactment… just an account of what happened.”

“An account… as if we’re investigating a murder.” He didn’t bother to hide his displeasure. Sophia felt intimidated, but she couldn’t give up now. Stepping closer, she said, “I believe I have a right to an explanation. Especially since I don’t remember it clearly. If you are truly concerned about my anxiety, you shouldn’t find my request so offensive.”

An expression of utter boredom spread across his face, making Sophia flinch. But just as quickly, it vanished, replaced by a mask of tenderness. He took her hand in his. “Sophia, I want to marry you as soon as possible.”

The sudden confession and touch startled her. She tried to pull back, but his grip was firm. “It pains me to see you so wary of me. When you look at me with suspicion, as if I’m lying, it stings. Frankly, it’s baffling. You confessed your love to me, yet you treat me like a thief.”

Was it the warmth of his hand, or the softness in his expression? His words swayed her slightly. From his perspective, she could understand his confusion and displeasure. But still, there were things she couldn’t reconcile.

“I’m sorry. But I hope you understand. You can’t know what it’s like to have a blank space dictate your fate. I just want to fill in that blank, even a little.”

The tenderness vanished once more. Sometimes, when he looked down at her with this impassive expression, Sophia wondered if he was waiting for her submission. She felt as if she had to kneel and bow her head to survive. It was strange. He had merely withdrawn his smile, never once acting threateningly.